‘You don’t love your kids if you’re not willing to spend the money’: Wife Pressures Her Husband to Buy Her Children Expensive Luggage, A Tradition From His Previous Marriage

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  • 01
    Posted by u/travelinman55 13 hours ago AITA for not carrying on another family's tradition? C
  • 02
    In our house, we have two birthdays coming up. My wife's son Marcel (turning 16) and her daughter Marceline (turning 13). Asking them what they want for their birthday, they both said that just the "normal gift" was great. Seeing that I was confused, my wife helpfully reminded me of the "traditional luggage gift", and then I realized.
  • 03
    There was a family tradition of giving kids a luggage set for their 16th birthday, yes, but that was my ex-wife's family, not mine. I was never even involved. It was always a thing for them. A few decades ago, one of my ex's sisters got a job at a high-end luggage company, and took over for the next gen of the family (my daughter and her cousins) because
  • 04
    she could get it for really cheap with her discount. My daughter is the youngest of the kids on that side, and around the time she was turning 13, between the aunt knowing she would be retiring soon and some personal drama, they decided to give my daughter her set for her 13th birthday so she wouldn't be left out.
  • 05
    I've always thought that tradition was stupid and a stupid amount of money to spend. Even $1,000 is way too much to spend on luggage for anyone, especially a kid. I wouldn't spend that much on myself. I tried to tell them all of this. My wife thinks that by letting my daughter participate (by accepting the gift), I've made it my family tradition as well, and now
  • 06
    I'm just singling her kids out. I'm not. Not caring about her accepting a gift from her own aunts doesn't mean I don't still think it's stupid. There's a LOT of difference between "you can't have this because it's not worth buying" and "you can't have this because I think it's inappropriate or dangerous".
  • 07
    Also, it would be even more expensive for us to buy it for them than even the aunt spent on my daughter. My daughter's set cost me $0, and her aunt $1,000 as she had a discount. Buying the other kids' sets would cost me $2,000 each, so $4,000.
  • 08
    Now everyone is upset at me because I'm apparently making it clear that I don't care about Marcel and Marceline as much as my daughter because I'm breaking tradition and telling them they don't "deserve anything" that my daughter had. Am I wrong for thinking this is ridiculous?
  • 09
    StonewallBrigade21. 13 hr. ago Professor Emeritass [88] My daughter's set cost me $0, and her aunt $1,000 as she had a discount. Buying the other kids' sets would cost me $2,000 each, so $4,000.
  • 10
    Correct me if I'm wrong on any of this: So the sister of the woman you are no longer even married to is now retired and no longer buying the discounted but still crazy expensive luggage ... and now your wife
  • 11
    and now your wife thinks that YOU should now spend a total of 4 grand on luggage for her kids who were never related to or knew the aunt?? $4,000 for luggage... for teenagers?? lol oh no. NTA.
  • 12
    INFO: Why can't your wife buy them this nonsense?
  • 13
    RickRussellTX. 12 hr. ago Colo-rectal Surgeon [32] Why can't your wife buy them this nonsense? Oh, come on, why ask this question at all? You know the answer. Because the new wife has found a wedge
  • 14
    issue that she can use to claim OP's treatment of her and her kids is unfair, and by God above she's not going to waste it.
  • 15
    False-Explanation 702 12 hr. ago Pooperintendant [62] Some people bring baggage into a relationship. She found a way to bring it from the ex-wife.
  • 16
    StrikingCow4967. 11 hr. ago Partassipant [1] In this case, the baggage is luggage.
  • 17
    purplehippobitches. 10 hr. ago Partassipant [1] Yeah I agree..if your wife wants to continue the tradition she can...by making her siblings pay for thousand dollars. luggage. Or she can pay yourself. The tradition is not for you to pay for it.
  • 18
    MuchAstronaut9932 · 10 hr. ago Partassipant [1] In fact, the tradition is specifically for him not to pay for it.
  • 19
    Perspex Sea 10 hr. ago Yes, it's not a parent gifting tradition, it was your ex SIL's gifting tradition.
  • 20
    Paulcaterham 1 hr. ago It's not even a family tradition, it only lasted whilst Aunty had a job at a luggage store - that's a habit at best
  • 21
    RainbowPause · 9 hr. ago I had no idea there was $4k luggage out there I felt vaguely decadent spending $79 on a carryon
  • 22
    Wonderful-Result2036. 13 hr. ago Partassipant [2] ΝΤΑ Your daughter received a birthday gift from your ex's family. You did not buy it. This gift has nothing to do with your step children. Knowing this, your wife should
  • 23
    have managed her children's expectations. Her thinking that they should get the same thing for their birthday as your children and their cousins on their mother's side set her own children up for disappointment.
  • 24
    The cost of the luggage set is irrelevant, but unless you are in the top 5% income bracket the price tag on that luggage set is ridiculous and impractical. That luggage set goes into the trunk of a Bentley.

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